As illustrated above, the clear consensus in the open-ended responses in the participants to wait until the late 20s or early 30s before marrying fits with clear consensus in the literature. This will be her second marriage, the first divorce being filed less than 6 months after the wedding. I agree with this, however, my curiosity is about having children in this situation.

Author Danielle Crittenden warns that “by waiting and waiting and waiting to commit to someone, our capacity for love shrinks and withers.”** Crittenden's statement could apply well to the experience of diminishing returns when individuals pursue a series of dead-end relationships. What Our Mothers Didn't Tell Us: Why Happiness Eludes the Modern Woman. If women make it a goal to wait until age 30 to settle down, then wait an additional 3.5 years to get married, and THEN start having children, then they would be increasing their chance of birth defects.

lenth of dating before marrige-18

I was attending a close friend’s wedding at the Harvard Club of New York, an elegant “Harvard on Harvard” marriage.

When the bride threw the bouquet, the cluster of single women immediately jumped away from it and the unclaimed bouquet landed on the floor.

I thought I really knew who I was just after college..it has taken me years to become more comfortable in my own skin.

I am SO glad I did not marry the person I thought I would marry when I was 21..would be divorced by now. You are a full grown-up and know yourself better than you did in your 20s.

Because it felt important and timely, I deviated last week from my central topic to write a short piece on deceptive marketing practices affecting untold numbers of returning Veterans with G. In addition to being a highly accomplished group, well-educated people are thoughtful planners and strategists.

This week brings a refocus on the central theme of this blog: What are the multiple reasons that well-educated people have better marriages relative to the general population?

Demographers Teresa Castro-Martin and Larry Bumpass assert that “the inverse relationship between age at marriage and the likelihood of marital disruption is among the strongest and most consistently documented in the literature.”*** Dating for a sufficiently lengthy period allows us to establish a stronger sense of self and to define life goals and priorities. Example: Average 10 month engagement period, so pre-engagement dating for 2.75 years engagement period of 0.85 years = pre-marriage relationship duration of 3.6 years.

A later age of marriage and a more lengthy courtship explains in some part the high levels of marital satisfaction reported within my well educated sample of respondents.

They do not leave their futures—including their marriages—up to chance, but instead proceed through life in a very intentional manner.